ifdown.net

Episodes

2018-11-01
Parallel Interlude: Mystery Dinner
2018-11-23
Missing Contact
2019-01-18
Tribe Named "Dan"
2019-02-15
An Aboleth Named George
2019-02-28
Sir Thomas
2019-03-21
Where to Next...
2019-04-18
Then End of Jim Dark Magic?
2019-04-28
Steadly
2019-05-10
The Hobgoblin Attack

1. Parallel Interlude: Mystery Dinner

2018-11-01

In a parallel version of Delway, Parallel-Dr. Phil, Lord Faro Blimby Nar-nar De'Radwo Slyn VII Esq., and Garth, find themselves the guest of Count Vorloft.

After the celebratory feast, our adventurers awoke to a panicked guard corps. The Count's daughter, Amelia, had been kidnapped during the night. Thankfully, the party had slept in the guard barracks and so had an alibi above reproach. Knowing the party's reputation, the captain of the guard, Oscar, requested their assistance in the matter.

After a brief investigation of the scene of the crime, strange scratch marks and a letter intimating that Amelia had been having a dalliance with a gentleman not of the court, the team decided to interview the suspects, who were guests at the dinner the night before.

After some clever word play and magically enhanced persuasion, the crew was able to discover

  1. A commoner who'd killed a nobleman and was attempting to impersonate him in order to marry Amelia (subsequently arrested and sentenced to hard labour in the Gnome Underdark Mining Corporation's mines)
  2. A spy sent to discover the aforementioned commoner and bring him to justice.
  3. A secret wererat lover of Amelia, who had kidnapped her for a ritual to turn her into a wererat so that she would be able to be with him forever.

After learning of what happened to Amelia, the team heading to the sewers to find and rescue her. Thanks to a well-timed Fireball, and a hasty retreat, they were able to exit the sewers and return to the keep with Amelia alive (barely), and their reputations intact.

2. Missing Contact

2018-11-23

The P-Team, having arrived in the Crown City of Jewel, sought council from the contact given to them by Vanard von Wroth, one Sir Thomas of Rouge. Calling upon him in the royal palace, the P-Team discovered he's been missing for several days. A peculiar interaction with one of the royal staff, led Su Yuan and Dr. Phil to investigate the palace further.

Eventually the two were accosted by a shady gnome, referring only to himself as "Mittens". Mittens offered to introduce the team to his boss, who most assuredly knew more details of Sir Thomas' disappearance.

After some negotiation, and a rather costly bribe, Mittens led the two to the door five metres away, and introduced them to Lord Morcom Kester, spymaster for the throne.

The team learned that Sir Thomas had been sent on a diplomatic mission to the undercity several days ago, and had not returned as expected. He was to speak with the King of the undercity deuregar, and to form an alliance with him against any possible Southern aggression.

Additionally, the team learned that the castle staff whom had been acting peculiary had had his memory wiped by some unknown magic. This was of great concern to Lord Kester, but he refused to speak of it further.

The P-Team agreed to have Mittens guide them through the undercity to discover the fate of Sir Thomas and report back, or save him if necessary.

The motley crew ventured into the undercity where they were quickly accosted by a group of bandits all named "Dan". The bandits were quickly dispatched with after they intimated their desire to use Jimmy's gold pouch without his consent.

Before trampling the last of the bandits, Dr. Phil learned of a secret passage in the hall they were in. He took point, leading the crew to a small campfire Dr. Phil found a stupendously obese man, and a rail thin man. Through arcane means of pursuasion he learned they too were named "Dan" and that the other "Dan's" were their friends.

Unfortunately, Obese-Dan was not as taken by Dr. Phil's charm as Skinny-Dan, and declared his intention to harm anyone in their lair not in the "Dan Gang".

Su Yuan took this as his cue and initiated a prospectively-defensive first strike on Obese-Dan.

The session ended mid-battle, with Obese-Dan transformed into a giant scorpion.

3. Tribe Named "Dan"

2019-01-18

The P-Team continued their melee with Obese-Dan-cum-scorpion. Su Yuan scored two critical hits on one turn, and was followed by Salim severing the tail of the beast as well as rending several of its legs.

Returned to his repulsive druid form Obese-Dan, frightened for his life, took one final, desperate measure, and broke his own finger to activate a magical ring that transformed him into a swarm of rats. The rats scurried down a nearby hole, but were quickly followed and dispatched by Jimmy.

As the fat criminal turned to escape further down the hole, Su Yuan jumped down, crushing his head and ending both the chase and the large man's life.

As the team took stock of their surroundings, they found a tunnel filled with viscera, dead bodies and rent flesh. Mittens and Su Yuan quietly ventured ahead while the rest of the team regrouped. Both of them wary of what they'd walked into saw flitters of movement followed by a conspicuous silence. They returned to the group where a reinvigorated Dr. Phil decided he would move on ahead, extricating himself from the warnings (and grip) of Su Yuan, he immediately came face to face with a giant scaly dog-like creature.

Thinking quickly Dr. Phil cast invisibility on himself and Su Yuan, and slipped past the creature, quickly starting to explore the rest of the passage.

Meanwhile, Jimmy attempted to pursuade the creature, by using his druidic powers to speak with it that it didn't want anything to do with us. The creature was unmoved by the attempt at persuasion, and began attacking the remaining P-Team members in earnest.

Su-Yuan managed to slip past and stun the creature, allowing the others to slip past to the interior of the path as well. Seizing the opportunity, Su Yuan took one of the sticks of dynamite that he'd acquired for the assault on Count Vorlofts' keep, and was able to light it and place it on (or rather, in) the creature.

Making a hasty retreat, the dynamite exploded, destroying the creature, injuring some of the team and collapsing their escape route. With no other option, they pushed forward to find Dr. Phil, and hopefully Sir Thomas or at least the King of the undercity deuregar.

Dr. Phil continued far ahead, and found himself in a room with what appeared to be three pups of the giant dog-like creature the companions had run into earlier. Despite his best efforts, he managed to draw their attention and his only escape route was a tiny hole. He jumped in, and slid until it opened in the ceiling of a chamber, 60 feet up. The fall knocked Dr. Phil unconscious, and left him in a dire situation, alone and with his only campanions not knowing where he'd gone.

Just as he could feel the life leaving him, he was approached by a familiar presence. "It took you long enough", said Dr. Phil, and with this Bill Bailey found himself again in a dark chamber with one rotted exit and no idea how he got there...

The rest of the P-Team came to the room Dr. Phil had gone down the hole in, but now it was empty. After some investigation and calling down the hole, they heard Bill respond. Salim and Su Yuan lowered Mittens down on a rope to see what he could do. As they were doing so, they were attacked by the monsterous dog-like pups.

Dispatching of them, the team was eventually able to get Bill hauled up the the higher chamber. Backtracking briefly they found an iron gate with a rusted padlock, and made their way into a hallway not filled with half-eaten corpses. There they took a brief respite and ended the session.

4. An Aboleth Named George

2019-02-15

The P-Team, after a short break discussed their options moving forward. Bill Bailey, terrified of the dungeon refused to move forward until convinced by Su Yuan that the only way to find Julia would be to delve deeper into the sewers.

Su Yuan and Bill Bailey discussed the past of the young blacksmith's apprentice. Before he started having his episodes, he had gone out with friends and awoke in the middle of what appeared to be some kind of cult ritual. Cultists in purple robes, with their faces hidden were performing a blood sacrifice. Bill ran and escaped. He didn't know how long ago that was, nor did he know anything about how he got there. He just knew that he feels a warm sensation and a light and then wakes up in dangerous situations.

Su Yuan described to him, his transformation to Dr. Phil, but the poor lad struggled to understand, and the P-Team could do little to explain the experience.

Eventually, rested enough, the team ventured forward where they came across a grate in the ground with a milky white water underneath. Poking it, they revealed a gelatenous cube that immediately tried to consume them. After the defeat of the cube, and another brief rest, the team finally found a crossroads that Mittens recognised and started to make their way much deeper underground.

Leaving the sewers behind, they made their way to the beginning of the underdark, where they found a massive underground lake. The water completely still.

Mittens warned the group the be silent, and not to touch the water. Miraculously, and despite several temptations, the P-Team managed to heed his advice and made their way uneventfully across the lake in a magical raft that left the water undisturbed. Halfway across the lake, the team saw what they recognised as an Aboleth, which is the creature Mittens was cautioning against disturbing.

Finally, after disembarking on the other side of the lake, the team found their way to a campsite and was able to get a night's rest.

In the morning they found Bill once again returned to Dr. Phil, who characteristically started his best effort to ruin any kind of subtlety or clandestine approach the team had planned.

5. Sir Thomas

2019-02-28

With the return of Dr. Phil the group pushed further into the underdark. Eventually, their path opened to a massive underground chamber where they found themselves greeted by two Duergar guards.

Thankfully Jimmy spoke Duergan and was able to communicate the groups desire to speak with the king. Despite this, a non-Duergar Dwarven ambassador was summoned to speak with the group in common. He explained to the group that they could not meet with the king directly, but that he could arrange a meeting with some other nobility or bureaucrat who would hear out their questions.

The ambassador revealed that Sir Thomas had visited the city several weeks ago, and argued with the king before leaving.

With this little information, the adventurers saw no other course than to allow themselves to be escorted by the guards to a spartan waiting room.

Jimmy did his best to converse with the guard left to observe them, but had little luck. After a number of uncomfortable minutes, the guard excused himself and left the group alone.

Dr. Phil grew anxious and started looking around. Soon realising that they weren't in a waiting room as much as a cell, though perhaps an unconventional one. The corridor was enclosed on either side by doors with a magical locks.

Meanwhile Su Yuan discovered another room similar to the one in which they'd been placed, and felt a slight draft coming from the floor stones.

With Salim's help, they pulled up a stone and revealed a bound and magically silenced Sir Thomas of Rouge. The P-Team unbound and dispelled the magic of the silence and finally were able to speak with the nobleman.

Sir Thomas revealed he'd been speaking with the King of the Duergar about the threat of the southern kingdoms. The King was apathetic to the plight of those above ground, and despite Sir Thomas' efforts he was unable to convince him to form an alliance.

With this failure, he turned to leave, and the next thing he remembered was awakening in this hovel, bound and magically gagged.

With this, the team quickly resolved with Sir Thomas to quickly make egress from the underdark. Dispelling the magic of the locked doors, Dr. Phil looked out into the town to realise that the entire duergar militia was forming up to attack them.

Sir Thomas assured the group that he would be able to create a path to the exit. The team burst into the courtyard.

To their happy surprise, Sir Thomas revealed his true form — a adult bronze dragon. He held off the frontal assault while the P-Team was defended the rear.

After dispatching of the first wave of attacking duergar, Sir Thomas and the team saw their chance and moved with haste towards the exit. As they neared the edge of town, however, their vision became clouded and dark tentacles appeared in a way halting their progress. Entangling Sir Thomas, the next wave of the duergar assault started to overwhelm him despite being in his dragon form.

The team turned to see the King of the Duegar, dead eyed, emerge from the underground fortress. Behind him came a tentacle mouthed illithid.

Before the illithid or the King could react, Su Yuan reached into his bag of holding, pictured his last remaining magic bean in his mind's eye. As it materialised in his palm he threw it in the direction of the illithid.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then the earth shook and a tiny pyramid appeared. The pyamid grew larger and larger, forcing the mind flayer and the king back into the fortress before settling unnaturally in the midst of the duergar city. Towering over the rest of the structures and blocking any entrace or exit to the fortress.

With this the tentacles disappeared. Sir Thomas threw off his attackers and explained that he recognised the magic of the pyramid. Inside the pyramid would be a mummy lord, a formiddible opponent even for the dragon himself.

Upward through the underdark and to the sewers, past their own destructive path the team ventured back to the Crown City of Jewel.

6. Where to Next...

2019-03-21

Returning from the underdark, exhausted and pushed to their limit, the P-Team was ready for a well earned break. They were granted rooms in the royal palace for the night and drifted into a deep slumber.

Upon awakening, they approached Sir Thomas in his office where Su Yuan gave a more detailed description of the risk a southern invasion would pose.

He described his former life as personal general to the Emperor. Lu Kai was the vizier of the empire. He gathered support and led a coup against the Emperor, killing him and all his heirs before taking the throne for himself. Su Yuan narrowly escaped with his life.

The team also gave Sir Thomas details of strange happenings in the northern mountains that they'd uncovered. The agent smuggling weapons from the south to bandits in the north. The demonic possession of Count Vorloft in Delway. The appearance of Lu Kai in a dead soldier.

Sir Thomas was left to ponder on this news, and suggested that the crew go to speak with the court wizard who was in need of adventurers to help with something that could be used against the Southern Imperial Army.

So not to leave them thinking that he was not grateful for the service they'd provided in rescuing him; Sir Thomas also granted the team a country estate. Land, keep and servants.

After discussing their options, the P-Team agreed that first they would speak with the count wizard before deciding on their next course of action.

They made their way to the wizards keep, where he quickly enlisted them in a harebrained scheme to go back in time to discover the source of all magic in the kingdom.

Despite their reservations, they eventually agreed (and were contractually bound) to have their consciousnesses sent back in time.

Upon arriving they discovered a giant statue of a human bound in chains and locks. Immediately they were set upon by cultists, despite several attempts at diplomacy.

They also found a strange hammer. Upon picking it up, it bound itself to the holder until one of the locks on the giant was smashed with it.

The team slowly made their way up the giant, smashing lock after lock and being harried by cultists the entire time. Each lock seemed to bring more life and freedom back to the statue.

7. Then End of Jim Dark Magic?

2019-04-18

As the crew continued up the statue they found a barracks in which they could have a short respite from combat. After a few moments of licking their wounds, the team continued up to the final chamber.

There they found the leader of the cultists, and a horde of his followers. Despite this, the team heroically destroyed the final lock and defeated the remaining cultists.

Upon this, the arcane power entrapping the giant statue was lifted and it was able to walk away. The team wasn't quite sure, by they thought they saw a brief sentiment of gratitude on his way.

Soon they were yanked back to the present by the court wizard, who explained that this was not the source of all magic, but instead was a god, who the team rescued from captivity. After this, the Crown City of Jewel's past was rewritten. Instead of two major religions, there were three.

The team was able to avoid having their past rewritten since the chamber used by the court wizard exists outside of time and space.

The wizard, quickly reabsorbed in his research to try other coordinates for the source of all magic dismissed the P Team, thanking them (with a healthy amount of platinum for their work), and assuring them he'd call on them again should he find another potential source.

As the group made their way back towards the castle they met a runner who informed them that Lord Morcom Kester was waiting for them south of the city. They also realised that a festival was afoot; a religous festival celebrating the freeing of a plain faced grey god from his chains. Legend has it that he was freed by an army of 100.

Finally the team made their way to an inn, where Dr. Phil sweat talked the bouncers and they were able to get some well earned rest.

Waking up in the early evening, the crew happily discovered that Jim Dark Magic was having his last show in the Crown City. Upon this news they knew they had to attend. After a long wait in line, they made their way into the circus tent.

Dr. Phil and Su Yuan made their way to the front of the crowd, which was held back by a magical barrier. Unable to resist the lure of Jim, Dr. Phil reached deep inside, finding inspiration in the visage of the cleverest wizard the world had ever known and dispelled the barrier.

The crowd surged forward, screaming in ecstasy as they could get closer to Jim Dark Magic. Before any serious injury could befall them, Jim appeared from the ceiling and a wave of magic swept the crowd into a preternatural calm.

All of the crowd save one; Su Yuan. Meditation and reflection on Jim Dark Magic had been plaguing the monk for many days. Despite his adoration, he felt something off. And this time, instead of being swept up in the charm of the magic, Su Yuan found tranquility in his mind and remained aware.

Jim, believing that everything was fine, sat down to read a book (his autobiography of course).

Stealthily, Su Yuan crept behind the enchanter before striking, hitting a ki point specifically to disable the wizard for a few moments. Upon disabling him, the magic was dispelled from all who were present.

Thinking quickly, Su Yuan addressed the crowd, telling them of the fraud of Jim Dark Magic. He bound Jim's hands and gagged his mouth. However, he would deliver him safely to justice.

Word spread quickly through the town and soon there was a messenger from Vanard von Wroth asking that Jim be remanded into custody of the crown. After some assurances that he would be treated humanely and that he would not be released, Su Yuan relented.

And with this, the crowd cheered "Monk! Monk! Monk!" (a rally curiously started by Dr. Phil). The team were liberators yet again.

With this the team began preparations to head south to discover the motive behind the southern aggression, and to stop it before it could spread to the north.

8. Steadly

2019-04-28

After the previous rest, the P-Team began to head south with a cart to meet Lord Kester. Soon upon leaving the crown city of Jewel they encountered the spymaster posing as a cabbage farmer.

He informed the team of what he knew of the cities in the southernmost regions of the kingdom. There are two primary locations

  1. The elvish city of Ered Nuan. The elves have always been reluctant allies of other races, and Morcom had precious little intelligence from the cities of late.
  2. The dragonborn twin cities of Hedjet and Weset. There is some fracas amongst the royalty of the city. Salim's family was connected to the power struggle, though he hadn't heard from them in some time either.

After some brief deliberations, the team decided that it made the most sense to first attend to the dragonborn city. There, Salim could attend to his family and perhaps the team could gain some powerful noble allies.

As the group decided, Lord Kester warned them that the crown had not heard from the main supply post on the road. He introduced the group to Steadly "Danger" Carson, a halfling mercenary who would be accompanying the team to investigate the supply post problem.

And with that, the team embarked. After some time they came across a ruined carriage in the middle of the road. Cautiously Su Yuan crept forward and discovered three ankhegs buried and waiting to ambush any passers by.

Before they could formulate a sensible plan of attack, though, Steadly fired several arrows into the ground, and the three creatures burst forth. Despite his eagerness and ruining of the element of surprise, Steadly proved himself a powerful ally, and extremely capable with a long bow.

After the ankhegs were disposed of, the team searched the cart that had been destroyed, but found no signs of either dead or surviving travelers. Nor did they find anything of value amongst the wreckage.

Continuing on, the team finally arrived at the supply station. Clear cut on all sides for over a hundred feet, the group had no way of approaching stealthily. And since there was no obvious reason for concern they worked their way forward. Just as they reached the halfway point, five hobgoblin archers appeared and began to fire salvo after salvo at the team caught in the open field.

Despite their tactical disadvantage, the crack archer skills of Steadly, and several giant carnivores Jimmy summoned from his bag of tricks gave Su Yuan and Salim the cover they needed to close the distance and neutralise the archer threat.

In the supply station they found the leader of the hobgoblins and were able to capture and interrogate him. He revealed that reenforcements were on their way and that they intended to occupy the supply station permanently.

Steadly was also able to find and free the previous civilian minders of the station, though the guards had been killed by the hobgoblins.

Given what the hobgoblin leader had told them of the impending attack, the group began to formulate a defensive plan...

9. The Hobgoblin Attack

2019-05-10

With their best laid plans ready, the team defeated the hobgoblins without incident.

Despite their best efforts to interrogate the hobgoblin general, he revealed nothing of their motives other than greed and hate. No connection to the south.

With his mission accomplished Steadly made his way back to Morcom, while the rest of the team started to work their way towards the twin dragonborn cities of Hedjet and Weset.

Player Characters

Su Yuan

A monk from the southern kingdoms. Before becoming a monk, he was the general for the imperial court, tasked with the personal safety of the Emperor himself. Liu Kai betrayed him and the Emperor, killing the latter and forcing the exile of the former.

Unable to pass the opportunity to challenge another to a battle of might, has a deep hatred and fear of the dark arts and especially necromancy, and unwilling to allow injustice to go uncontested, Su Yuan is often willing to charge in without thinking and is the first to put himself in front of danger.

Annoyingly polite. Allegedly a "flaming homosexual" according to profile notes from Dr. Phil.

Dr. Phil

A strange arrogant elf who believes he was previously the host of a popular psychology show.

Studious of others' behaviour, he is constantly taking notes about those around him.

Unaware of his surroundings and willing to blindly walk into the face of danger, he's rude, ostentatious, and insulting.

He sometimes is possessed by an alternate personality in Bill Bailey.

Bill Bailey

Dr. Phil's alternate personality. Commoner son of a blacksmith. Searching for Julia. He doesn't understand why he continues to have the episodes where he blacks out and wakes up far in the future in dangerous situations.

Jimmy

In the likeness of the cockatoo Aarakocra's, he is on the verge of insanity. Often agitated, and attracted by shiny objects, not much is known about his past.

Salim

Paladin of the dragonborn empire. Sardonic with a biting wit, he is the tank of the group.

Lord Faro Blimby Nar-nar De'Radwo Slyn VII Esq.

Managing director of the Gnome Underdark Mining Corporation. Billionaire, philanthropist, adventurer, and Victorian Gentleman.

Dr. Phil (Parallel Universe)

Parallel version of Dr. Phil. Has a weakness for noble men with curly hair. Hates basic bitches.

Garth

Escaped the cult he was born into, but is plagued by the traumatic actions he was forced to take as a child. Loves rats.

Mittens (real name unknown)

Gnomish rogue working for Lord Morcom Kester (the spymaster for the Crown City of Jewel). Focused and clever, never one to miss the opportunity to make a bit of coin.

Steadly "Danger" Carson

Not much is known of steadly other than he is a mercenary working for Lord Morcom Kester.

Non Player Characters

Sir Thomas of Rouge

Bronze dragon, though often appearing in his human form. He is the head diplomat for foreign relations for the Crown City of Jewel.

Lord Morcom Kester

Spymaster for the Crown City of Jewel.

Vanard von Wroth

Not much is known of Vanard, other than he is the head of the King's guard.

Liu Kai

Former vizier of the southern empire. He betrayed the Emperor, killing the imperial family and all of it's successors.

A powerful necromancy, he tried to kill Su Yuan during the pogrom. Su Yuan narrowly escaped, but has been plotting vengenge ever since.

Julia

A girl familiar to Bill Bailey. He's unable to recall exactly how he knows her, but knows that he must find her.